Haters Be Hatin'

Posts tagged ‘tiger woods’

Coming soon to a television near you- "Whores"

Celebrity news is all abuzz with the shocker that a new celebrity reality show is in the works and it will be hosted by none other than Skkkankalicious Michelle McGee and Tiger’s fourth alleged mistress Jamie Jungers.  I wonder if Ma and Pa Jungers are proud of their little go-getter.

Now, when I first heard this rumor I thought to myself what could the show possibly be called? Skanks on Ice? Hoes Digg’in Dirt? Fill in the Hole? Cocktail Waitress Nazis? Could always keep it simple and just call it Whores.

The new show that is currently being shopped around Los Angeles is actually called Celebrity Cheaters by the original creator of Cheaters, Bobby Goldstein. According to Goldstein’s pitch, “Celebrity Cheaters” will try and “catch celebrity cheaters with their pants down… one of the first [Cheaters] cases that I ever had to turn down involved Ike Turner.” Is this guy nuts? Didn’t he see What’s Love Got to Do with It? I would stay the hell away from Ike or else I’d be getting the belt.

Trying to express his rationale behind a celebrity version Goldstein goes on to explain:

“Then, a few weeks ago, a colleague of mine in TV thought this [could offer] some utility for the young women who’ve found themselves cast aside by these gentlemen they’ve had these affairs with. I thought, let’s turn them into converts who are willing to preach the gospel, and have them restore their integrity.”

Ironically, McGee once applied to be on “Cheaters” to try to trap an ex. She was denied. Hopefully, Bombshell and Jungers don’t have crazy success with the show and can go back to doing what they do best- sucking dick. You know… nothing special.

Burnt Toast 4-12-10

by RabidCareBear on April 12th, 2010

Now THIS is a better Tiger Woods commercial.

Hey, didja hear Tiger played golf yesterday? I swear, I honestly believe Jesus could come back and receive less coverage than this club swinger got yesterday at The Masters.

Well, if all the hoopla about the man returning to golf wasn’t enough, the big debate was all about a new Nike commercial that premiered on ESPN. I’m sure you have seen or heard about the new ad, but in short, it’s black and white Woods, with his recently deceased father speaking over the shot.

Check it out below:

A slew of people are upset at Woods, saying that he is capitalizing on his dead father now. I don’t really see this as a moment of him capitalizing but simply as a moment where he is baring himself to the world. Yes, he screwed up. Big. Really big. But he still has a billion in his pocket, and you don’t.

Tiger wants everyone to know that he has screwed up so big that he is willing to use his dead father to scold him in an advertisement. This seems pretty damn personal to me. But then again, when you think about it… Tiger Woods’ father was kind of a scumbag too. I guess it might be a little bit of that old saying, “Like father, like son.”

Maybe Nike should have gone with a different voice-over for the commercial.

You know, something less controversial:

Ahh, but then again… what do I know?

Nike. Just Do It!

The perfect gift for your mom's birthday!

The rumors are true ladies- Tiger has got some major wood and now you can experience having it in YOUR hole! Thanks to Pipedream Products you too can now go for a ride on the Tiger Woods 9-Iron in the comfort of your own home.

Yes, that’s right. There is finally a Tiger Woods love doll and as the box says it’s the “#1 Golf Love Doll.”

I actually wonder if Tiger’s wife will purchase the doll just to remember what having sex with him was like. You know what is kind of funny, the doll actually has a better short game than me. I had a sex doll once and I was embarrassed of it, now I have a sex doll that appears on Gatorade bottles, it is so G.

The truth about the sex doll is wether it slices or hooks, hits a trap or winds up in a hazard, it always gets in the hole no matter how many strokes it takes.

Nick Orlandino, COO of Pipedream says:

“We’re following in the footsteps of Larry Flynt and all of the other porn parodies out there, and the Take Home Tiger is no different. Look for more hilarious products from Pipedream in the future.”

"I love to whack it hard out of the rough..."

And if the Tiger Woods blowup doll doesn’t do it for your Tiger sex fantasies they also offer the “Tuggin Tiger” collectable! It comes complete with awesome marketing slogans like “He Takes A Clubbin’ and Keeps on Tuggin” so these babies are guaranteed to disappear faster than his hoe’s panties!

My only problem with this wind up toy is that there is a 9-iron wrapped around his head. I personally would have used a sand wedge. I’d prefer the sand wedge due to the fact that the wedge has a sharper cut and not only really gets under the balls in play but is great for whacking out of the bush.

The Daily Dollar 3-15-10

by RabidCareBear on March 15th, 2010

Four Child Vloggers (Cracked)

Group Therapy Win (Fail Blog)

The Real Tiger Wood’s Apology (Comedy Juice)

Jon Stewart Takes On Beck (Huffington Post)

There's a big difference between dickslappin' and pimpslappin'

If you thought Chris Brown couldn’t be any more of a raging douchebag… he still manages to surprise. Shocking! Chris Brown sat down for an exclusive interview with Mojo in the Morning and when asked about Tiger Woods’ infidelity and the drama surrounding it… ChrisBeatHerDown manages to make the question about himself.

Here is one of our favorite quotes:

“Whatever his personal life is—and I think this goes for me and him—his personal life is his personal life. Nobody has the right to place judgment or make any judgment on somebody else’s personal life when they’re not directly involved with them,” he continues. “He plays golf. That’s his sport, that’s his hobby, that’s his love, that’s what people love him for. They don’t love him for the other stuff that they talk about. Even with me, I do music, I sing songs, I’m an entertainer, I’m a performer. But people make mistakes.”

Now is it just us or is there not a HUGE difference between a man sleeping around on his wife and a man pulverizing his girlfriend over some skanky text? I mean, it would be one thing if Tiger Woods had whipped out his massive lovestick and smacked the bitches around for awhile before putting it into their holes.

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