A farmer? Or a terrorist? You decide!

Those Slumdog Millionaires have now thought of a genius way of fighting fire with ass fire. That’s right folks, the Indian people are taking their hottest peppers and are going to use them in tear gas.

The Ghost Chili, which holds the Guinness record of the world’s spiciest pepper, will now be used as a base for tear gas and smoke grenades. This is great news and I really hope Tabasco somehow gets involved.

The ghost chili is basically pure fire in bite and will knock out anyone who dares to eat it. What I love is that the Indian people use the chili to cure stomach ailments and fight the blistering heat. I really don’t understand the individual that says, “Whew, it’s 110 degrees out here, someone order up some ghost chili wings.” What I can’t wait for is when the mob controls the chili racket. “You want these chilis, well, you’re gonna have to pay for them.”

What I kind of love about the use of a pepper as a weapon would be that it’s almost the same tactics as a prank on someone. It’s like that scene in Dumb and Dumber when they load up the peppers on the hitman’s burgers and they wind up killing him. I wonder if we can start somehow playing ring and run on people and when they open the door, the bag of poop explodes and the fecal matter in the bag contains H1N1.

I have a lot of good ideas! Someone get me to the CIA… I bet I could finish this whole fiasco with a whoopee cushion filled with strychnine.

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