Looks guys! I have a peen!!

I really dont know much about Lady Gaga. She says that David Bowie and Queen are huge influences on her career. Which sorta makes the next fact slightly less surprising. She also possess a tremendous tool, her schlong. I worked at a Houlihans earlier this year, and for those who do not have a Houlihans near them, it’s that restaurant not too far from your house that has mediocre food, a happy hour, and all the servers look stoned and the music is way way way too loud.  That song, Just Dance, came on a lot.  I really hated it.  Maybe it was the job, but I’m pretty sure it was the song.  Then I got the opportunity to listen to Pokerface.  Which I guess is a female anthem of not letting a boy know that you like them. However, now we know that no matter what happens for Lady Gaga, if she is unlucky any particular night all she has to do is bend enough and she’ll eventually still get a peepee in her mouth because she’s a hermaphrodite.

And she’s proud of it.

Its not something that I’m ashamed of, just isn’t something that I go around telling everyone. Yes. I have both male and female genitalia, but i consider myself a female. Its just a little bit of a penis and really doesn’t interfere much with my life. The reason I haven’t talked about it is that its not a big deal to me. like come on. its not like we all go around talking about our vags. I think this is a great opportunity to make other multiple gendered people feel more comfortable with their bodies. I’m sexy, I’m hot. i have both a poon and a peener. big fucking deal. – L8dGaGa

So sometime over the past week the music diva was at some concert in some third world country when she rode in on a motorcycle, jumped off and whoops, there is captain winky hanging out which as we all know is why Roger Podacter is dead (Ace Ventura reference).

I can and will poke her face

Reminds me of my golden rule.  If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it probably has a penis.  Wait, that wasnt my old rule.  I dont even remember my old rule, but overall, I would like to extend my personal best wishes to GaGa during these troubled times. Look at Rupaul.  He/She still has somewhat of a career, being on some random VH-1 show every now and then. GaGa look at it like this- All of your songs were hits in gay clubs to begin with… uh….. not that I really know….. for sure….. uh…… but I assure you they will still continue to be played at The Cage in Hoboken, NJ for a long time to come.  So relax, tuck your sack back in, and keep on showing that pokerface.  We think you have three of a kind but we all know you have a pair with an ace high.

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